We celebrate fathers this weekend, and even though reports indicate that far more gifts are given to mothers on Mother’s Day, I also learned something interesting. One report said that families, particularly children, tend to pool their resources and buy dad one gift as opposed to individual family members who tend to buy their mothers individual gifts. Isn’t that interesting? At the risk of reading too much into this, it may indicate a more communal sense of gratitude for dads that comes as a great compliment to the individual gratitude for moms. Perhaps it indicates our inert appreciation for the individual attention we receive from both dads and moms and the communal sense of support and leadership that parents provide.
I am also certain that for some families and at some times the communal and individual gift giving on Father’s Day and Mother’s Day switches. Either way, I would like to use this gift giving pattern as an opportunity for all of us to reflect on the complimentary communal role of parents and individual roles of parents. At times we need individual attention and focus from parents, and at times we need to be together as families and be nurtured by the energy of the group, however large or small.
Many family structures do not permit a partnership or balance of the communal and individual roles of both parents for many reasons, and this Father’s Day and next Mother’s Day may be opportunities for you to acknowledge your parents communal presence to and with your entire family, regardless of your family structure, be it a single parent home or some separation from parents geographically, physically or emotionally. And may this Father’s Day be an opportunity for you to acknowledge and appreciate your father’s individual attention to and with you, as well as his attention and support of your entire family where possible, if possible, be he living or deceased, or whatever your experience of your father.
I want to thank one particular father as I return from my mini-sabbatical, and that is Father Rich Jakubik. He has assumed many additional responsibilities in my absence including writing this column. I want to express particular admiration and gratitude for his excellent article on the feast of The Body and Blood of Christ. As I read it from afar, I was moved by his connection between Social Justice and the Eucharist. Thanks, Rich!
Another father that I wish to thank is Father Bill Zavaski who also stepped up during my absence. Bill has significantly enriched my faith journey, that of my family and my priestly ministry journey for many years. His presence at St. James Parish in Arlington Heights during my growing up years was a blessing. And speaking of fathers, he and my father Bill shared many discussions and even some disagreements, but my dad came to have a respect for Bill Zavaski that lasted until his death. My dad continually expressed admiration and respect for Bill Zavaski’s ministry and shared that respect with our family on a regular basis. Thanks, Bill Zavaski!
My time away was indeed a blessing. I spent extended periods of time at the Sycamore Tree Retreat House in Swan Lake, Montana and St. Thomas the Apostle Retreat Center in Cody, Wyoming. These were both places of solitude in different settings, both filled with the beauty of God’s creation. Montana provided me with a daily view of the Rocky Mountains, tall pine trees, daily walks with the threat of (but never an encounter with) bears and mountain lions. Driving to the retreat house I was greeted by a pack of eight wild horses running right down the highway. Wyoming was a picture of the open plain with mountains in the background and just about everything western in nature, Buffalo Bill Cody, the rodeo and more.
I am not usually drawn to nature and I didn’t venture out a whole lot, but I did appreciate the BIG sky that I came to embrace as an image of a very BIG God who looks over us every second of our lives.
The setting provided me with an opportunity to write and that was my first and most important goal, I started with a couple of ideas and paths for future books, but eventually settled in on extended writing about work. I am fascinated with the varying views, opinions and experiences of work. My contention is that our work is God’s work. God began working in the story of creation and we are all asked to continue that work in the endeavors of our lives. I will keep you updated on the progress of this writing endeavor.
Most importantly, I have returned with a profound appreciation for Holy Family. I realize what a deeply spiritual, although sometimes complex, community of faith we have here. I cherish the energy and creativity we have here. I appreciate the empowerment of the laity and our progressive spirit. We are in this together and I appreciate that many of you share that conviction.
Tomorrow starts our tri-annual Priest Convocation at Pheasant Run Resort in St. Charles. Fr. Rich and I will be attending this convocation as will so many of the other priests in the Archdiocese. Cardinal Cupich has asked that parishes hold Word and Communion services on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday mornings while we are away. This enables parishioners to gather in prayer, receive the nourishment of God’s Word proclaimed and Communion.
Because we here at Holy Family also have 7:00pm evening Masses on Monday and Wednesday, we will have Masses at those times as scheduled.